Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Finding Your Goulash

My two older children begin college this Monday.  My son is actually leaving.  It's his second year, and he will be living 4 hours away from home.  I remember last year struggling with his departure and loving his return trips home.  I couldn't wait for him to come home to visit.  I fussed over the house, and wanted it clean and in great shape.  Then came the moment when I was preparing his 'favorite meal'.  His whole life I've been a full-time working mom (a school administrator), and mother of three...taking the kids to their many, many after school activities.  We often ate on the run, and not always together.  So I'm thinking about that special meal to prepare for his return.  I have no idea what to make him.  I call him and ask what he wants.  "I don't care, ma...whatever you feel like making is good for me.  Just do goulash".  Then I realize, I don't cook.  I make about 3 things...weekly (and probably weakly!).  He has no 'favorite meal' that I can make for him to return home to eat.  I failed!  I'm devastated.  I love my mother's southern fried chicken and okra, and her biscuits and gravy.  I need him to love something of mine.  Right?  Or do I?

It took the year for me to realize that no, I don't.  He needs me to be me.  His mom that he knows is here always, loving him the way that I have for 19 years.  With Stouffers French Bread pizzas always on hand in that freezer waiting for him. He needs his home that is conveniently located right around the corner from Tim Hortons and McDonalds and Taco Bell for all of the meals required. And he will enjoy that sometimes I will pull off an amazing (yes, somewhat amazing) meal out of my oven once in a blue moon with the help of  I can cook, if I have the time. But loving my kids had me getting them where they needed to be for 18 years and attending those events at dinner time.  Our cars looked and smelled like a dinner table.   What do we all enjoy?  My goulash.  It's simple, but yummy.  Everyone has their own version of goulash.  Find your family's...and make it special.  Eat that at the table every now and then.  They'll come home from college wanting that and it will be great!  ;)

Keep it your kids, and be proud of the way you love them!  ♥D

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